broken dreams,
glued together.

only if you saw beyond the cracks painted on them.


...and i will try and fix you...

Faith, rediscovered.

I am drifting away,
running,
I am falling into this deep, dark abyss.

Won't you hold on to what's left of me?
The fading echo of me that still lingers in this hollow nothingness?
I am becoming but an empty shell,
I have lost faith.
I am now a girl with strained beliefs.
With unanswered questions.
I am now an organised mess.

You are becoming fainter still,
And I, more disillusioned than before.
Mute you stand there flanked by them,
Alone I stand here not knowing where to go.

I am but a lost soul at sea,
tossed by the waves of science and discovery.
They pull me further away from you, my shore,
and pushes me towards that land unknown.

I have always found the need of you,
the need for that eternal ray of hope.
I have always found me wanting you,
that reassuring Faith,
the need to feel life in my core.

A half-devilish laugh escapes you,
You stare at me knowingly.
And smile.
I realise.

You have been inside me all along,
too clever to respond.
I cried and wailed for what I thought I had lost.
You silently hugged me and kept me warm.

Reunited, I stand now with you by my side.
The shadows of oblivion have shown me the light.
The birds sing again and the buds now flower,
and I have sense of you again,
oh! Faith, rediscovered.

forever has its end.

would you care to say that you are there,
or would you silently slip that shoulder under my cheek?
would you do all that you can to give me strength,
or carefully hold me when i am weak?


...when the bubbles die out,
the booze shall take over...


you are searching for a lost reason,
a drowsy numbness pains.
would angels live tonight
with cocaine and mary jane?


if you could feel that joy within you,
you shall know that life is here.
and if you are grappling in the dark,
know that hope is near.


...and when hope is gone and battles are lost,
you shall find me as the smile still etched on your face...




[[to one of the nicest friends i have...sorry if you thought i was being distant...i really didn't mean to.]]

A New Beginning.

Okay.
I lost my last three blogs to my memory.
That is to say, I forgot the password to my old id.
And no, it was not my regular gmail id.
It was a different one altogether.
Damn me, I tell you.
So yes, this is my new one.
And yes, I shall blog more frequently now so that I don't forget my password.
Not that I didn't blog frequently before.
Its just that deviantArt came in the way.
(that reminds me....the url is blackhearttintedred.deviantart.com)



I actually wrote a lot of things during my I-don't-remember-how-long hiatus.
So it shall take me quite some time to actually post all of that down.
No, I wont post anything else RIGHT NOW.
I'm just feeling very sleepy.
(It is 1.05 in the afternoon, if you are curious.)
I shall do it sometime later.
So keep checking back, if you want to.




Yes, I am finally in college.
And I have finally managed to shut a lot of people up.
And this also means that I have finally grown up, but no body seems to be agreeing with me on this point.
Darn!




But the point is that I HAVE come a long way over the last one year.
Mentally, emotionally, spiritually....I have grown.
I am not that stupid whining little teenager anymore.
To think of it, I was actually an idiot a year back.
Damn me, again!




And I shall stop now.
I am bored already.



Cheers.