blah.

this post is not supposed to be fulfilling any purpose other than wasting precious webspace.
enjoy.
:)

"good evening, infidels"

okay.
this post has been long overdue.
it is funny how everyone is catching up with the achmed fever.
oh, no.
wait.
its not a fever.
no.
achmed is a way of life.
yes.


thank you sumi for introducing me to achmed.
now, the important part is the importance of achmed.
you see, i have a very short attention span.
and achmed has been able to successfully hold on to my attention for nearly a year now.
and so, you just HAVE to consider achmed seriously.
he is probably the only person i like dead.
(oh, wait. no. there are quite a few other people who i would prefer dead too)

i don't understand why no one gives him the importance he deserves.
i mean, where else would you find a terrorist who makes people go "oh damn! you are *bwahahahahdfg*?
you NEED to check this man out.
i know you haven't
don't lie.
which brings me back to why i am making this post.
well, i never really did get to the point.
but, that is not the point.

this post is to spread awareness about achmed.
for weeks, i have been all over the place shouting "i kill you".
some shout back the same.
others think i am some red-orange plutonian caught in mars.
to those others, watch brilliance unfold.

i wish they made men like him.
there would at least be something to look forward too.
*sigh*

okay.
i don't know what to write anymore.
i could shout and hurl obscenities at you for not loving achmed.
but then again, i am told that i am a good girl.
i don't quite want to spoil that image.
*sigh*

so, for now, bow.

no title.

okay.
so this is another shut-the-fuck-up-soumi blog post.
i will rant and rage and poop and shit.
and you will read this post, no matter what.
no, that statement was not a threat.
that was the way i summarise normal human behaviour.
you are anticipating an extremely interesting and engaging post.
and just so that you know, you are not allowed to shout at me and curse me if you end up hating yourself for reading this.
i know i will.
but yes, i shall not tolerate any kind of obscenity on this page.
this is MY blog.
i make the rules.
however, i am allowed to break the rules myself.
but that is not the point.
the point is that you need to be on your best behaviour.
something you could never get yourself to do when you were in school.
or anywhere else, for that matter.
so, be good.
be very, very good.
*sigh*


now comes the difficult part.
what am i exactly writing about?

nothing in particular.

people are actually taking the pain to set up bombs at strategic areas and cause national turmoil.
what the *beep*?!
its easier to blow up those ruddy good-for-nothing politicians, you know?
you'd even get to become a national hero that way.
did you even think about it?

okay.
so.
what if i get blown up tomorrow morning?
what if?
my mum will cry until she faints.
she'll regain consciousness and again cry until she faints.
that is a never ending cycle.
i am not quite sure what my dad will do.
he might cry.
or he might just stare at my corpse in disbelief.
and my sister?
oh, don't even get me started on that.
what about you?
you might laugh at first.
and then go "wait, what? no. are you serious?"
and after that, i shall let you do what you want to do.
but yes, try executing the opening scene properly.
after that, its an open script.


now, i just realised that i need to leave behind a piece of goodbye letter or some shit like that.
so yes, if i die, just read this out to the world.
keep a dharna or a candle march or something appropriate.

*ahem ahem*
yes, so, i would like to thank my mommy dearest for having brought me up the way she did.
and also for having the patience to bear with me after having brought me up the way she did.
i would like to thank dad for gifting me the "my dad is my atm" t-shirt and living by it.
and also for being the coolest dad ever.
(no, my dad is The Coolest.)
i would like to thank my sister for being my punchbag for so many years.
and kicking my arse when i needed it.
i would like to thank mashi and bubun da for giving me all the bellyaches i got after the afternoon PJ sessions.
i would like to thank my guitars for being mine.
i would like to thank my friends for befriending me.
and also for not running away.
i would like to thank microsoft giving us IE.
and the mozilla guys for giving us mozilla.
i would like to thank an idiot for listening to me when i needed him to.
i would like to thank adobe photoshop for showing me my "creative" side.
i would like to thank my pen for not running out of ink during my JUDE entrance exam.
i would like to thank JUDE for being so brilliant.
i would like to thank everyone at JUDE for being so uber brilliant.
i would like to thank vodafone for coming up with such great call plans.
i would like to thank nokia for giving me my phone.
i would like to thank jim morrison for being my god.
i would like to thank jimi hendrix, al di meola and bb king for being more than gods.
i would like to thank the air around my place for being clean enough for me to breathe.
i would like to thank all my blog readers for having survived all that i write.
and FINALLY, i would like to thank myself for no particular reason at all.


phew.


so, if i die tomorrow, please tell my family that i loved them.
and maybe you too.
i am not too sure.

*sigh*


see.
there was no reason why you should have wasted so much time.
no reason at all.

hope you had a good laugh.
i did.

HAH.